If you are striving for equality in your relationship, you might be doing it all wrong. Our guests today Nate and Kaley Klemp, are a married couple and co-authors of the new book The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier Stronger Relationship, recently named an editor’s choice pick by the New York Times.

According to the authors, striving for a 50/50 marriage is really just a framework for failure.

Farnoosh and the Klemps explore the shift from fairness to what the couple calls radical generosity, as well as individual to shared success. They also share a number of tools for making these shifts real in the areas of saving, spending and balancing power.